Emotional Triggers

What are they, how to recognize them and how to overcome them.

~~Before we go on I'd like to mention that I'm not a doctor or healthcare professional and in this post I speak about my own personal experience and understanding. What has worked for me may not necessarily work for you and you should always seek professional help if you are suffering with your mental health.~~

Triggers are a response or reaction to something that instantly changes your state of mind/emotions. It could be a song that reminds you of a traumatic or upsetting time, a smell that is linked to a memory, a memory itself or something someone says to you. Triggers have been linked to anxiety and depression and without understanding them or realizing that you are affected by them, it can leave you very confused when you "overreact" when something "sets you off" or "triggers" you.

Speaking from personal experience, I like so many others developed anxiety around 5-6 months into the Covid-19 pandemic last year. The stress of working with the public, being over-worked, fear of catching the virus, doubting life choices I had made up to that point- linked to social media comparison, left me all knotted up inside. I was tense, always on edge and everything I was feeling felt amplified. A simple word that would be said without malice would trigger me and I would have a sudden outburst of tears. Most days in my job I would be so focused on holding myself together that as soon as I clocked off, all the emotional build up from the day would spill over. I cried, hyper-ventilated and raged out in private never wanting to be seen because I couldn't explain my own confusion of why simple things were having such an emotional effect on me. Then one day while listening to a podcast I heard someone speak about being "triggered" and what it meant to them. The sudden change in the emotional state, anger, fear, upset, suddenly all made sense.

Identifying a trigger is key. Rather than moving through the day on auto-pilot its important to try pay attention to your body and mind. Notice how you feel when things are going good, how does your body feel, are you tense or generally relaxed, is there a lot of mind chatter, are you able to focus on a task? Then try to take stock of those same things when you feel that hot mess rising in your chest. Have you tensed your body, is your jaw clenched, can you still focus or is everything spinning/foggy. Identifying those changes during a reaction will eventually help to identify a change in your state before you become fully triggered.

Keeping a journal to log the things that you feel caused the reaction are useful for later reflection. Write about how you feel, how you felt before and after, what helped-what didn't and how you feel reflecting back on it, do this every time and you will create a clearer picture of how to handle yourself. Practice mindfulness and grounding yourself, becoming very aware of your circumstances and then being able to quieten your mind is a very important skill to have. Here's an earlier post for 3 types of mindfulness/meditation for a complete beginner.

Talk to someone. I tried to keep my anxiety to myself and thought I was masking it well until loved ones and colleagues started to notice I was different, I was trying so hard to keep myself together that I stopped talking at work & at home. I stopped having lunch with colleagues instead choosing to go somewhere to be alone in case I needed to cry. Eventually when I spoke about it to Gavin and my family, I opened the floodgates, I cried so much I was afraid I wouldn't be able to stop. Until I did.

Talking about how I felt, what was happening, and what was setting me off, suddenly didn't feel so lonely and confusing.

Reach out to your GP, speaking to your doctor to get help isn't a weakness and they will likely put you in touch with a professional who will be able to help, teach and equip you with all the tools you need to overcome and take back control of your life.

It's important to remember you are not alone if you have anxiety, depression or suffer with your mental health. Most people struggle in one form or another and it's never a weakness to reach out and ask for help. As that saying used go "a problem shared, is a problem halved".

Love & Light